When you follow Him...

It is known that when you have decided to follow Him.. there is a price to pay...there is a high price that you need to know if you have decided to pick up the yoke...and He too paid a great price for us...was wandering of the phrase High Price..."orang kata ikut Dia ada harga yang tinggi perlu dibayar". not talking about money as physically....giving time,giving our total desire and thoughts to Him...

this few days i have been working my ass off (pardon my language) planning a seminar which is call a crashing aeroplane...!!i had to pick up from some geniuses who gave me 2 weeks with nothing!! and today is the day...!yesterday was havoc where nothing was right...but i knew the day would come when i would be push around and when the day had come i will push away...biasalah hidup ini begitu...i was so busy that i didn't have time to get upset...and something just click in my mind..Tiapa..semua ini bagi Dia..Do my best for Him and it'll be just fine...! as i got home last nite..i was thinking if being me doing my best...Do i have to slave around for those PEOPLE???who on the day would show up in front of big bosses that they did everything when they didn't do a thing???it came to a degree that i felt like what a unlucky dog i am born to a unknown family,born to a low race...born to country who despise ur religion!...(i know i know ..same kind of stupid question...i was asking God too if You want the best from me can i just not be working with people who threat me like rubbish...!still having no idea why...but at the end of the day i felt proud that i was able to do lot's myself...and achieve lots this few  days..contacting people...talking to people...even getting scolded...but never mine it's all fine....
so even if i have to lower the price of myself to get things done...even to the point of begging...as long as i know i did my best...for Him ...i will be fine....! on and on this pain goes on in this place..but i will be fine..as long as i know...the best has yet to come...

handling this seminar...i found out how low people can be to get what they want...how low they can make themself when they are desperate....how they bow to people that they think will bring them up to higher places....when those big guns are just the same ...

and here is me...who only has one thing in my mind....Thank You Lord for this job which you give me to put food on my table....! (i am trying so hard to remind myself about this)

even if the even is today...i just leave it to Him...even if i get scolded when things go wrong...i know i have done well myself...i know i did everything the best....

being positive in thoughts does really helps..and it helps me to be sane even in the insane times...!
i might not be a Prof next time...neither might i  ever be a Dato'  i just want to stay a child of God always clinging to Him...that is what that matters...

heartnote:This world does not give us happiness...and eternal life...but He does!