It's MY LIFE...

Life seems to be goin on and on as it is....

A typical working day of my life :

6.30am :Cock Crow..(bunyi alarm hp..tp bangun and set 6.45am)

6.45am: Alarm bunyi lagi...tutup tapi tido balik..5 minit lagi lah...

6.55am: Grab my towel and off to mandi...

7.15am: Iron Baju and bersiap2...

7.30am: Gone out the door...!!

7.55am: sampai opis terchenta...!(tipuuuuu...tak like langsung)

8.00am-9.00am: log in FB,Blog..dan blog2 lain..email...!

9.00am kerja lahhh..........

10.00am Breakfast....

10.30am :kerja lagiiiiiiiiii...(sambil2 FB and blogs stalking)

1.00pm Lunch Break..

2.00pm-5pm - kerjas lagi...

5.15pm- GO HOME!!! (sambil senyum2)

6.00pm - Watch tv sambil2 kunyah2 apa2 yg patut or sometimes potong2 sayur2 hahaaa

7.00pm- masak utk housemate...and diri sendiri

8.00pm- habis makan...tengok News...(mana lah tau cuti di umumkan tu lah kena tengok berita) tapi always can never finish the whole news...selalu tertido...

10.20pm- KOREA TIME....

11.30pm- masuk bilik layah FB lagi...! sampai tertido dengan laptop masih on...!

2.30am /4.30am: Never failed to bangun time ini to off laptop...!!

and continue the next day

my days are boringgggggggggggggggg

Bored With the internet...

it always feels like this sometimes...

Life is just ordinary if you want it to be and it's adventures if u are creative....

the feelin of Suffocated

I am a simple person trying to carry on with my life...

When you do things on your free will..you feel nice and good...

When you are force to do something...There's just a feelin of lazyness...and sometime a feelin of menyampah ness..!

expectation tinggi membuat diri ini sangat letih...!! bila di banding2 membuat diri ini lebih meluat...!!

haish knp i rasa rimas..! rimas...rimas...! rasa terikat..!

perasaan ini hanya sekejap...esok lusa di harap melupakan...!

Can't i ever be happy of doin things with my free will...i am just feelin trapped..! dem this feelin...smoga esok lebih baik dari hari ni dan semalam...! dan lusa lebih dahsyat dari esok...!

This Helpless Feelin of mine

Hari Raya Kedua...

Early this morning i had a call from my dad asking if i could go to sarikei...when you are far away this is the conversation that makes u feel helpless...and it sucksssss...! Spontanuosity is in my blood...! i just wanted to pack up and just go to the airport...!but i don't know what made me just stay where i was....the next thing i did was tidy the house..sweep..mop..and wash...! Denying feelings seems to be the best thing...was on the edge of breaking down saja...

Lepas tu aku ajak sorang kawan p karoks...! there you go ...that's what i did instead...! 3 jam straight...!

after karoks...when shopping...!then ada kawan lama Molly sms me...aku apa lagi ajak her to dinner...(Hargai lah kawan lama kan..! while masih ada masa...jgn mau mati atau mati sudah baru menyesal...demmit..!!)

malam2 balik rumah...letih...! tido..!

Whole night asking God to give time...! God help! God please...

*gambar ini hiasan semata-mata...but i just like the feelin of it

My DIET Went Crash Boom Bang...!

1st Day RAYA...

Happy Raya Everybody..! IT's a holiday time..!
"Aku rasa aku dah lost weight sudah..!!" this was what was playing in my mine..! but then the festive season had to come and ruin everything...semua salah ko semua salahhhhh kooooooooooo..!! (*cover line dengan rasa tidak bersalah hahhaa)

Makan syndrom started with pre raya where i had a delicious extravaganza western meal...ini gara2 mata besar dari perut.. byk sangat mengorder...



Went to melaka this morning for Raya at my cousins place...before that ..had to tell...i drove my cousin Jacob's Triton this morning...fuh dahsyat lah drive 4wd ni...cruising the highway...miraclely there was no jammed today...where have everybody gone!!! but as usual..me as the pilot...memang suka bawa sesat2 hahahaa...sekali lagi utk tahun ini beraya aku sesat lagi...! every year p mesti buat adegan sesat!!! macam ritual pulak..~

as usual beraya mesti is all about makans...(hhehehe ini taksiran sesat aku)so apa lagi lah makan sini makan sana..!never ending eating story...siap tapau lagi bila balik..!

This pics is my aunty and cousins...(see it's really genetic...i tell you genetic!!)

And i had to make things worst by goin to secret recipe to buy cakes...I am so so addicted to Macadamia White Choc Cake...!! it's been almost a week that i have cravings for it...!craving as in hari2 makan ...aduhsssssss...demmit..!! please stop jane...please....!

oh ya ni latest obsession too...makan begitu saja..and makan dengan nasi pun boleh...!! TEMPEYEK!!

I SO HATE HOLIDAYS NOW...!! hahahhaa..asal cuti saja makan non stop!! aduii..dui..dui...! and i think by the end of this holiday aku ni will be addicted to something too...! macam everynite saja ada drinking session ni...! kena habis kan lah if not will sambung and sambung :P...

see ya next update..i have to eat something again........!

Pre Raya Feelin...

Perasaan ini sungguh tak best...! everyone is in a festive mood...but i am sad...!

tak best..tak best...

tiba2 aku rasa rindu sama kampung...

Denying reality so that life will be fantastic...!

I just got a sms from my mom saying a childhood friend of mine is having cancer final stage....! terus ada feelin numb....i knew she was sick..and i knew she was undergoing chemo...but i tot she was getting better...

don't know this feelin...part of me is angry with the ONE who permits things to happen...part of me is saying everything happens with a cause...! i so just want to go under my blanket and just cry...but i know that won't help...

Denying reality so that life will be fantastic...!


________________________________________________________
*update 18/09/09

Today she's in icu :.(

God please...help...

Paano Na Kaya??

kadang2 rasa macam trap bila rasa rimas...!! you feel that you can't breath...hari ni aku rasa aku emo...aku rasa marah ..aku rasa menyampah..! this is what i feel...because most of all i felt the helpless ness feelin in me...! take left turn...take right turn pun susah....!! the guilt that is in me...! Paano Na Kaya??? what do i do now?

kadang2 rasa susah mau please smua hati kan...?hati sendiri gi mana...! sometimes when people mess up...wat wud we do?? and sometimes masa kita pun teda mood...ada org ceritakan benda2 stengah2 lepas tu leave us in the middle with nothing....kadang2 rasa letih emosi saja lah.. tapi don't know lah...as a friend,apa perlu aku buat...? tapi i know is masa aku byk benda mau pikir... i hate it when ada perasaan rimas...!! i hate it when ada org membuat aku bersalah....!! (w/pun aku rasa aku tak buat salah..) tp aku rasa ini small matter lah boleh di settle semasa perasaan masing2 waras....but memang tidak dinafikan ada perasaan spoil sudah di hati....mungkin perlu masa utk pulih kan ...we let time be the judge of that... semua itu belum pasti lagi....!

tahu kah engko wahai langit otak aku tengah bercelaru sekarang....!! I wish i could be on a high mountain looking down at everything and just scream out supaya hati puas....!! I wish i could dive in the deep sea and watch everything move in it own pace....I wish life is as easy as writing the number 1.....knp aku rasa sesak nafas ah..! there's nothing actually...just tetiba hari ni rasa sungguh tidak best di hati...!just tidak best...!


Paano Na Kaya??
(What do I do now?) How did I get into this mess? ... ( baru tau translation ini tajuk lagu dalam blog ini)
the song is about......it's all about the person who has fallen in-love with his/her best friend but can't voice out the feelings...

check out the translation on the song here :http://www.esnips.com/doc/374b9c4a-1c63-4918-a360-b402f3d25701/PAANO-NA-KAYA

ini tidak ada kaitan sama ini post sbenarnya...just tetiba in a missed of all the mess tetiba mau cari meeting lagu ni...ini pulak lagu ini...! hmm well life goes on kan..!!

My friend is a convert..!

My friend finaly converted yesterday..sebenarnya lama sudah dia mau tapi byk benda make dia fikir byk lagi...dia ada cakap kalau bapa dia tau her dad will freak out...after lot's of talk and dicussion of the consiquenses...she finaly took the plunge...I tetiba rasa best sebab ada kawan yang sudah kena convert...feelin a bit proud of her too..rather bangga juga sebab i was there to witness it..!
so mare... take gud care of your new love in ur life k..! tidak sabar aku berjalan bersama ko dua...we can do a double date k..!;P
Don't be too fast in judging my title...!

this was wat i did the whole weekend...! makan dan makan lagi..! was a good one .....




thanks guys for a weekend well spend...!

Came a long way...

As i sit in my room signing some letters...at a glance i saw my name on my door...

tiba2 tersenyum sendiri...! hati pun berbisik "Jauh pulak this life has brought me...!" I came a long way to be where i am today...funny juga...sometimes rasa macam mau mati saja hari2 bangun pagi just to come to work..kena maki2..kena cakap2...kena suruh2...

tiba2 today i remembered myself as the small girl yang kena drag to school when i was 3...memang hati keras tidak mo skolah..! and i remembered my first punishment masa di kindergarthen...tak pandai spell HIDUNG...!! i was 4 k..panjang tu perkataan tu..!

the girl who ponteng chinese class after school..sebab rasa diri bukan chinese (padahal tumpang cikgu tu balik rumah)...

the girl who ponteng kelas piano to p jalan2 n lepak with kawan....(1 tahun aku rasa aku tipu mak bapak aku...)

the girl who got not as good grade masa SRP (sekarang PMR) tapi just said to herself : oh well...bukan mati pun...

the girl who got a surprise of her life masa SPM....(ingatkan memang fail sudah)

the girl who prayed so hard until it hurts..utk pass diploma...!!

the girl who had the bestest time of her life during Uni...!!

Then by miracle ended up working as an officer....!! WHAT a LIFE...!! masa kerja lah baru tau kekebalan dan kekuatan hati sendiri...!! mengubah minda 360 degrees...people come an go dalam my life too..! and been through hard,hardest and good times too....

so today i sit in my office dengan hati ...well i've gotta give thanks more because of this LIFE....!

hidup ini perlu di terus kan..! w/pun kadang2 ada sesak nafas...! hidup ini perlu di teruskan..!

THIS MADE MY DAY TODAY....

this song somehow made me laugh just now....!

gilors sudah gwe.....

keboringan tahap gaban dua hari ni.....

APA GUNA PERGI LUAR NEGERI NAIK KINABALU HATI SAYA RINDU :p