We were 7 now left 6...

Dulu kami 7 sekarang tinggal 6...

i have been denying myself for the pass few weeks....but i think it has to end now ....

Dulu masa kecil! the place i grew up...we had a family friend...we were so close that as almost we were brothers and sisters...they were a chinese family we were half chinese...

as kids...we always have the dumb things like...them being bumiputra wannabe...and us just wanna be the same as people around us...

i remember every school holiday they will come and stay over at our place...our parents were as close as brothers and sisters too...!

we went on long road trips....from kuching to miri...!! and back to sarikei...! to think about it we were really small to be able to fit in a van that uncle had...! we had head counts sebab selalu ada2 saja missing...ada lagi adegan sorang mesti jatuh longkang lah..! hilang lah...tertido lah...life was really great then...!

bila org tanya who is who..we would just answer adik..abang...or sister.. bro...!

we were that close...!!sampai kadang2 tak mau balik rumah sendiri...!

we grew up...! i went away to study...but occasional holiday back home the first thing was goin to see them...ada rumours lah cakap uncle sayang betul me and my bro more then them ...tapi i know he has his own ways to show love...3 years ago uncle pass on...! i was there...and was very sad...like burying a father to me...

and today...i bury a sister...i didn't go...i didn't do anything...i just sat at home and act like nothing happen....! i didn't even call aunty...cos i don't know wat to say....

Funeral was over a few hours ago...!

my sister...I bid you farewell...i know you are at a better place...! and in better hands...

futnote: i am sad..but i am feeling numb...so i have no feelings right now....i didn't go back cos i know i can't handle it...! God ..i still have nothing to say to you untill now...!