The happy boy...

The happy boy with his Godzila.....! it was good they had this at toysorus....after months of searching ....finally the boy got what he wanted....!!

The Darling Boy is 8

Our Darling boy is 8 today....( he'll get mad at me because he says that only his gramma can call him that...)

8 years ago when he decided to arrive about a few weeks earlier....cause everyone to panic....I remember hearing the Grand uncle even went to knock on shop door to ask them to open so they could by a tin of milk because the tiny little baby wouldn't suck BM...

Our lives turn over since he came....!! Priorities change!!...I remember I even went back to see him once a month...(where by before that I only came home once a year....)

Now he is 8....and he whines so much that at times I can't stand it...he complains like a old man....he doesn't eat durian...he doesn't eat anything unless it's deep fried....but I love him so much that if he is not home I miss him ....!!

he teaches me some lessons some times... about life...this little boy can change my perception of life ...
I know it'll be hard to survive this world growing up in a country that says they are not racist but have to admit they are....being a "rojak boy" with a little of everything in his blood...and have a mother tongue different from others....but I pray that he'll grow up to be a man..a wise one...!! and enjoy life as it comes....!

Happy Birthda Darling boy!!!

p/s.. he whispered to me last nite...requesting a birthday surprise...asking me to buy a cake and do the decoration and surprise him....!!! and I ask him what he wanted for his birthday present... a. Money b. Book c A toy...

he wanted a toy!!

and he wanted this!!!

a GODZILLA...

I can't seem to find this...but I will take him to toysurus to pick up a toy....!!

a simple life that impacted big...

this man i knew from when i was little....he was a man of little words...he was a man of little action...but i don't know why or what but he made a big impact in my life...he was my sunday school van driver from church...every sunday morning he ...never fail...rain or shine will turn up at our gate to pick us up...as our house was one of the farthest i was the first to be picked up and i had always had the privilage to sit in front...as i was always amaze of how driving was...or rather how someone could drive a car when i was little...as i watch him change gear..and if some of you from that generation ..you will know long time ago van had gear on the side of the steering wheel...and i was amaze on how he could change gear without looking at it..but sometime a few jerk here and then could be felt...this uncle didn't say much..he just drives...even with a full load of "monkeys" he was relax and drives without fail...as i out grew sunday school and joined youth fellowship...i kinda missed being chauffeured by the uncle...but one thing i remember...i always wanted to be a driver just like him...after 30 years...i am thankfull that he was apart of my growing years...i learned to drive when i was 18 and i passed my driving license in one shot...i came to kajang and join church and there i ended up becoming one of the first few drivers...chauffeuring people here and there....often i was reminded of this uncle ...of how he had so much patience in him...but i live to my dream of becoming a driver...and i drove for a few years...and even occasionally driving people around now....

And Today i bid farewell to a simple and ordinary man...that made a great impact in my life......

the weather as if setting the mood of sombre...it had been drizzling from morning none stop....

came back from work this evening ...and my dad told me someone i have known from small just passed away this morning..

Uncle Larry..May you rest in peace...

you really was a big impact on my life even as today...thank you for being the uncle driving the van to sunday school...thank you for being a servant of God...and i know you are in the best of hand....being a person of few words...i really thank you...!!

When life passes by....

As life passes by day by day....sometimes when we look at peoples achievements, got to admit we can't help it but to feel a tad of enviness in our heart....

but without realising what we have achieve by ourselves may be more then what some people have....recently in church i was reminded my the story of the 10 that was healed and 1 that came back and the 9 that was gone....all 10 were healed....but only one came back to thank Jesus....but the 9 were still healed...!! eventhough they didn't come back they were still healed....but the one that came back had fellowship with Him ....that was what the 9 missed.....

as life passes by...no matter how far we run...we will be blessed..no matter how far we are drifted away...God still loves us...and He GREATNESS wouldn't be less...but we are the one who missed out on the fellowship!!

i was hit on the head by the message that caught me unprepared....nothing i could do to cause God to love me more...cause He loves me more then ever, then what i can imagine....!

Recently after a long long time that i realize that how wonderful a sunset .... after a long long time i realise that it had been too long since i was with friends that made me not know how to joke...seems that i have forgotten how to have little petty conversation...made me forget how to enjoy life and be jolly...made me forget how to smile and brush things off...made me forget how to be thank full.....made me forget how to just let life be as it is....made me forget how to have fun....!! how to enjoy the fellowship with HIM ....

Lord...how great YOU are ...that You are the cup that never run dry....and i missed the time that i can say I am having the best time of my life!!!!

Feeling Outdated when Updated...

Last night after a long long time, I finally had time to spare for dinner with some friends...it has been a while...

the day started great...was a stress free one because the bosses are all away....and the students are on holiday...

but it was tarnished because of one wrong decision...(that's what I think...) but unfortunately because I had to follow the books...a phD student failed .... now I know who it feels when a patient dies in an OT....my fullest respect to surgeons out there...!! you guys have great hearts....!! when everyone said they wanted to postpone and I had to say just proceed...! and the student failed!!! haish.....!! it was like all the specialist were saying don't operate on the patient... and I had to be the one who say proceed and the patient dies....!!! aiyooo! ( hati tak sedap la!)

but oh well just went with the flow and had dinner with the friends...! after chit chatting I realize I was so outdated on various news...that when I asked myself where have I been??? I asked myself too...was this envyness in me?? but I wasn't feeling bitter or any sort...I was just surprise... oh well the earth will still circle the sun everyday...but I was just happy some friends are doing what they want to do and love to do...I wish I could do that too... but oh well there just ups and downs in life that everyone has to face...after discussing stuffs.. I came to find out that the definition of going on a holiday to me has change...I really want a nice and quite vacation....just wanna sleep in and enjoy my free time...I could see that eyes where staring at me when I said that...guess I am just tired of the life I am living right now...the journey is just too tiring to catch up and I am dying for a slow and just enjoying holiday....

I was being ask of what I want for my birthday this year...I just want  a quite and restful day...as I was driving home alone last night...I suddenly enjoyed the alone time driving round the city....I was alive again I thought to myself...! I don't know why but I would think just spending my time  sitting somewhere and staring at the sea or staring at the stars would be the best thing that I can think off right now....I must be getting old....

this morning as I was sending my nephew to school ...I love the little conversation we have on the way to school....can't deny this little boy thought me a lot about life.....

.I was asking him what he does with his pocket money...he said he bought RM1 keropok lekor...he is given RM2 a day for school...then I ask him how about the other RM1 he said his bff... was thirsty and he bought him a drink....! I ask did he shared it with you ...he replied: It's cheap only RM1 and I have my ribena anyways....tskk tskk tskk...I told him once in a while ok but not everyday you can spend your BFF...he asked me why??I said everyday RM 1, a month would be almost RM30...that's too much...he just sigh and we were silent the whole way...

but as I finish saying that....what is RM1 ...if it makes your BFF happy....I hope this young boy will grow up well ...and be strong as he live his life ...as he walk his path on the journey of life...life would be kind to him ...and at a young age he learn about giving...


heartnote: Just tired of life in a fast track....I just need some slowing down to do.....

What do you want ?

as I was sending my nephew to school this morning..we were having  a conversation and he was saying December is the best month of the whole year  because it was his Birthday month....! I ask him what he wanted for his birthday...i said A. Clothes B. Toys  C. Books D. Money   He look at me and said New CLOTHES!!!!... I ask him back are you sure...then he paused...and said...ok TOYS.. GODZILLA....and etc etc....he wanted toys....SIMPLE...!!

As I ask myself what I really want for MY Birthday...

I remembered what I wanted for life...

when I was young I wanted stuffs ...basic stuffs...a stamp album....a pencil box... board games...but when I grew older I started to think about life...what I wanted to do when I grew up....the one I most remembered was...I wanted to learn to drive...!! I wanted to go to KL to study...!!

for the number one..i wanted so much to learn to drive  because I adored my sunday school driver...and thought that the uncles driving us to church was great!!!..and at the same time my dad was sick and he couldn't change gears in our car...and I wanted to know how to drive so I could drive him...

the second one...I always wanted to study away from home....guess I did that...and nothing much...

So, now...What do I want in life...?

in a flash... MONEY...!! A PROMOTION!! MORE ASSETS !! all the worldly things...!!

but I think now if you ask me what I want in life...

I would answer you a Healthy Life...!! and especially this year...I want to do some community work...I want to do some volunteer work...I want to do something in life that is worth while....

Where is the Life....

I am stuck in a stupid meeting again where blaming the scape goat is the main agenda...!! and Guess you is the lucky scape goat..???

 

 I am really missing the life...!!

Life that is full of fantasies..!!